Thursday, May 12, 2011

a necessary open letter to: allergies

dear allergies,

you are not welcome here. go back to the hole you came from and stay there. do you benefit from my itchy eyes, dry skin, cold sweats and incessant coughing? does my increased irritability, discomfort and frustration somehow feed your children or support your economic problems? i have alternatives for you to consider, like getting a real job or searching for unemployment benefits. i understand the market isn't the perfect place for the likes of you, but in all seriousness, you're pissing me off and i can't deal with you anymore.

if this were a relationship, i probably would have broken up with you years ago. in a perfect world, we would have never met in that field of dandelions and tree pollen way back in the land of new jersey.

im over it.

please move on.


sincerely,
the back of my throat

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